Things I've Learned About God From My Kids (Take 814)

Actually, this should probably be entitled Things I've Learned About How I Treat God From My Kids, but that isn't the series I stared a zillion years ago. This comes close enough.

It's the sweetness factor that saves his hide.

So, Charming has been going through this I Must Play With Mommy All Day phase. We're going on five years now and I don't see it coming to an end any time soon. And the game of choice is Cars. Not just any old cars, oh no. CARS cars. Lightning McQueen. Chick Hicks. The King.

We set up elaborate sets for the Cars to act out their scenes. We have Radiator Springs scripts. We have Racetrack scripts. Sometimes we go off script and Lightning is the bad guy (but ONLY when we use "mad lightning." Never when we use "happy lightning." And Sally never cheers for Chick, even when mad Lightning is on a rampage.)

But I'm starting to catch on to the kid. He doesn't really want me to play. He wants me to be present. He wants me to watch him play. He might even make a demand of me every now and then. Be the Girl Cars on command. "Say, 'Go Lightning' Mommy!"

"Go Lightning!"

He likes to tell me it is time to find the racers. He puts me to work building the town out of Legos. He wants me to dig out the obscure Tokyo Guys so we can be modified and go harass Mack. But does he want my input? N.O.

He keeps up a steady stream of conversation with me, but doesn't usually listen for my reply. Except when he wants one and he says, "Are you listening, Mommy?! I said, 'Aren't I awesome?!'"

"Yes son, you are awesome."

Yes, this was during our "We are going to Africa, so we should paint the kitchen" phase. Ignore the background.

He wants me to push the cars, but only when he tells me to. He wants me to be the girl cars, but they don't get to play a part unless he says so. No girl cars get to talk until I've been informed that they should.

It doesn't matter if my ideas would make the game a whole lot more interesting. It might just revolutionize how his game is played. Nope. Not interested.

And as I was perched on my floor, cross legged in the midst of Cars galore, drinking my tea and thinking about everything and nothing because I didn't really need to be engaged, just present I had my "Ah-ha! moment."

Wow. This must be how God feels with me.

Hi God! Wanna come play with me? No, no. Don't tell me what to do God, for crying out loud, I have got this game under control. Just watch me play. Aren't I awesome? HEY! GOD! Are you paying attention? I asked you to do something! Why didn't you do it? Wait, wait, wait.....No. Not that way! You're doing it all wrong! Here. Let me show you how you should do it. Wait! Where are you going? I thought we were playing here! I know I was ignoring you, but that doesn't mean I didn't want you present. Well.....not that present. Give me some space. You know. Just...there. In case I decide I want you involved. Would you play the part of the friend today? Never mind. I didn't really want to play with you. This other thing caught my attention. Carry on. See you later. If I decide I want you, that is. And I'll expect you to drop everything and be there for me.