Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The True Story Behind Friday's Post

Friday's post garnered me a lot of attention. Well, a lot more than I'm used to, anyway. Not nearly as much as HolyMama or Queen of the Mayhem, or say, Owlhaven, but a lot for me.

Isn't it funny the things that get noticed?

Because the reason that post happened is simple. I couldn't find the anniversary card I had for Hubs. I found the envelope, but one of the kids (guessing Frodo here) ran off with the card. Or I misplaced it. Who knows? I was going to slip it into Hubs' computer bag before he left for work, and I couldn't find it (still haven't). So I sat down at the computer and pounded that out so that I could send him an email that linked over (Because he doesn't read my blog. I could write anything about him on there and he'd never know).

What the card said that I lost: I'll never stop...loving you.

Simple. Tasteful. Meaningful.

Yeah, right.

However, that post also came on the tail end of a discussion we had Thursday night wherein we discussed a friend of ours who recently told his wife that if she didn't change a certain behavior, he'd be gone. Granted this isn't a healthy behavior. Or necessarily one that is fun to live with, but it certainly isn't Biblical grounds for divorce.

That isn't the point.

After relaying this story (the friend is closer with Hubs than his wife is to me) Hubs mentioned that though the friend was probably trying to motivate his wife to change, what he probably did was remove the security, if any was present to begin with.

No matter how awful I've been to live with, and I've been pretty awful, Hubs has never made a threat like that. There were times, in my darkest hours, when I thought he would take off if he knew what was good for him. I suspect I even told him so. There were times when I thought what a bummer it was for him that the only reason I was still around was because I had no where else to go.

Oh, and in saying that, it wasn't because of anything he was doing, it was my own state of psychoses.

But I never said it out loud (to anyone but God). And he hung around, stuck it out (cheered when I went on anti-depressants), and even had more children with me...knowing that I would probably fall back into that pit.

I have a hunch that one of the major reasons I'm not really suffering post-partum depression this go 'round is because that man bathes me in prayer.

Anyway, so that post came because 1) I lost a card and 2)because it seems so many of our friends are giving up and 3) I'm so grateful he hasn't given up on me.

And now I feel all this pressure to be profound. Let's just go ahead and get that idea out of our heads, shall we? I'm rarely profound on purpose. Mostly I'm just goofy. But if any of you that linked through some other site come back; welcome (but don't expect profundity from me, K?)

4 comments:

Pasture Scott said...

My wife never reads mine either...and I always say such good stuff about her!

*whimper*

Chaos-Jamie said...

Those spouses. If they only knew the insight they'd have into WHAT on EARTH we're thinking...

VAIL said...

No tears? I don't know how you did it! I am always a basket case when one of mine graduates Kindergarten! Whew! 3 under 3!
I liked your Friday Post, the story behind it sounds a bit like a post I did "Heartfelt" http://wannabethoughts.blogspot.com/2007/03/heartfelt.html.
Have a fun weekend!

Wendy Richards said...

I'm just getting around to reading all my bloglines feeds. This post and the one to your hubby for your Anniversay really spoke to me. Sometimes I think I don' deserve the wonderful man God led me to, but I know he will be with me through every vow we make.