Monday, February 09, 2009

Could I Get A Price Check?!

There is a checker at Target that I am convinced is out to get me. It never fails that if I am buying something that might be considered remotely embarrassing, I'll end up in her lane. And it never fails that she will point it out, comment, get a price check, have a discussion with the lady in the next lane over about it, hold it up, wave it around and in general create horror within me.

Now, as both my father and my husband's mother read this blog, and non-friends as well as friends of another gender I'm not going to get particularly specific (you can all breathe a sigh of relief now) however, as the book I'm going to tell you about in a minute says, Can I be both godly and sensuous? Because the checker at Target is stifling my sensuality.

The lady from the next lane that she called over took one look at what she was waving around, one look at me, one look at the teenagers snorting in line behind me and told her to just take my word for it and put it though already! (BTW, I would have paid double to have not suffered that particular humiliation.)

I think she's intentionally trying to make sure she never has to check anyone out. This is not the first time she's humiliated me for a purchase. Makes me want to go through her line with something really crazy and see if she has limits.

You're really wondering now, aren't you? Ha! Well I'm not telling. It could be panties. It could be Immodium. You'll never know.

The thing is, I'm married. Have been for quite some time, now. I have children. Even a few biological children. I'm sporting a wedding band and can visit the lingerie department if I want to. But I avoid it like the plague because I'm ALWAYS caught there by someone in my church, or family, or my babysitter (Lord, have mercy, A.G. knows far too much about me).

We good Christian women don't talk about stuff like that. Nothing intimate. So we turn to books.

Nice segue, don't ya think? No seriously, cause I am NOT asking the checker at Target. (I have my thoughts about her motive, but I'll try to keep them to myself today.) And these conversations don't just come up at women's bible study. At least none that I've ever attended.

Intimate Issues answers the twenty-one questions about sex most frequently asked by Christian wives, as determined by a nationwide poll of over one thousand women. Written from the perspective of two mature Christian wives and Bible teachers–women who you’ll come to know as teachers and friends–Intimate Issues is biblical and informative: sometimes humorous, other times practical, but always honest. Through its solid teaching warm testimonials, scriptural insights, and experts’ advice, you’ll find resolution for your questions and fears, surprising insights about God’s perspective on sex, and a variety of practical and creative ideas for enhancing your physical relationship with the husband you love.

With warmth and wisdom, authors Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus speak woman to woman: examining the teachings of Scripture, exposing the lies of the world, and offering real hope that every woman’s marriage relationship can become all it was intended to be in God’s design.

And just in case you have questions you'd like answers for, but you aren't getting them at women's bible study either, I have an extra copy for giveaway. Just leave a comment or email me (contact in my profile) by Valentines-eve. I think Mommy4Life has a copy to give away this week also, among some other books, so you might check in over there, too.


MotherT said...

Sorry about your poor experience at Target! Some people need to take a tact lesson before they are unleashed on the general public!

The book sounds really interesting and one that I might like to share among my daughters and daughters-in-law. Count me in on the drawing.

Anonymous said...

I ran in to one of the girls I coached last season in the lingerie department of Target!

I need the book too, but as the recipient of a previous drawing, I'll sit this one out :).

mommy4life said...

You crack me up!! Obviously I don't need the book (because I already have it, NOT because I know everything...)- but speaking of target. The young male checker at Target last night couldn't believe how OLD I was, becuase "You don't look that old." was what he said to me. Anyway, when I told hubby last night, he told me the kid was coming on to me. I informed him that I think this particular person was not attracted to women at all, much less women who were 10+ yrs older.... 'nuff said.

But I did like it that he thought I was so much younger than I was.

Chaos-Jamie said...

IM, you can borrow mine and we can talk about it. Or not.

Anonymous said...

I'm not bashful. Okay, I'd likely blush furiously, but I'd still talk about it. I'd even try not to giggle when we used words that rhyme with "hex" or "tube".

In all honestly, I figure God made us to enjoy each other (within a marriage bed) and have no problem talking about such things. Sort of. And not that I've actually HAD any of these conversations.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like an interesting book!
Sorry about your tacky cashier. I think some people do that on purpose just to yank our chains.
Oh well...

Angi said...

Would love to win. Hae mental pictures of you in Target check out line . . . . I'm embarassed for you!